themselves or themself

Themselves or Themself: Which Is Correct?

Themselves or themself? This small grammar question causes a surprisingly large amount of confusion. Both forms appear in modern English, but they do not always serve the same purpose.

The difference becomes important when they refers to one person rather than several people.For example, you may write, “They prepared themselves,” when talking about several people. 

But what should you write when one person uses they/them pronouns? Is “They prepared themselves” correct, or should it be “They prepared themself”?

The answer depends on meaning, audience, and style. Themselves is the safer and more widely accepted choice, especially in formal writing. Themself is also a real English word. 

It is increasingly used as a singular reflexive form of they, particularly when referring to one person. Major dictionaries now record this use, although some still label it nonstandard.

This guide explains themselves or themself in simple terms. You will learn the history, regional differences, common mistakes, professional usage rules, and examples for everyday writing.

Themselves or Themself Quick Answer

Here is the simple rule:

  • Use themselves for plural people.
  • Use themselves for singular they when you want the safest choice in formal writing.
  • Use themself when singular they clearly refers to one person and your style guide or audience accepts it.

Examples

Plural:

The students prepared themselves for the exam.

Singular they:

Alex prepared themselves for the interview.

Also possible:

Alex prepared themself for the interview.

The second sentence makes the singular meaning more visible. However, themselves remains more widely accepted. Merriam-Webster notes that themself has increased in use as an alternative to singular themselves, while Oxford and Cambridge also record the form.

So, if you need one safe answer:

Use “themselves” unless you have a reason to use “themself.”

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The Origin of Themselves or Themself

Both forms have a long history.

Themselves comes from them + selves. Its recorded use goes back to the Middle English period. Merriam-Webster gives the first known use of themselves as the 13th century.

Themself is even older than many people expect. Merriam-Webster records its first known use in the 15th century. Historical evidence shows that themself was once used more widely than it is today.

Over time, themselves became the normal form for plural they. The older singular-looking form themself became much less common.

Modern English created a new reason for themself to return. Singular they is now widely used for a person whose gender is unknown, unspecified, or nonbinary. This creates a natural pattern:

  • they → them → their → theirs → themself

The logic is similar to:

  • he → him → his → himself
  • she → her → hers → herself
  • you → you → your → yours → yourself

The form themself therefore gives writers a clearly singular reflexive form. Major dictionaries now recognize this modern use, although they do not all give it the same status.

British English vs American English Spelling

There is an important point here: themselves and themself are not a British-versus-American spelling difference.

British and American English both use themselves. Both also use themself, although acceptance and frequency can vary by speaker, publication, and style guide.

Collins lists themself in both British and American English. Its British entry calls it a non-standard variant, while its American entry also records singular, gender-neutral use.

FormBritish EnglishAmerican EnglishMain use
themselvesStandardStandardPlural reflexive
themselvesCommon with singular theyCommon with singular theyGender-neutral singular
themselfUsed, but less formally acceptedIncreasingly usedSingular they
theirselfNonstandardNonstandardAvoid in formal writing
theirselvesNonstandardNonstandardAvoid in formal writing

The real difference is therefore usage and style, not spelling rules.

For example:

The players blamed themselves.

This is standard in both British and American English.

For one person:

Jordan blamed themselves.

This is widely used.

Or:

Jordan blamed themself.

This is increasingly used when the writer wants a singular reflexive form. Some style authorities accept it for this purpose. 

The Government of Canada, for example, lists both themselves and themself as possible reflexive forms for singular they.

Which Spelling Should You Use?

Your best choice depends on your reader.

For American English

Use themselves in general professional writing. Use themself when your publication, organization, or subject uses it.

Merriam-Webster recognizes themself and notes its growing use, especially for singular they and nonbinary people.

For British English

Themselves is the safest choice in formal writing. Themself is understood and increasingly visible, but some British dictionaries still describe it as nonstandard.

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For Canadian and Commonwealth English

Follow the relevant style guide. Canadian government guidance allows both themselves and themself for singular they, while noting that themselves is the standard form.

For global English

If your readers come from many countries, themselves is usually the safest option.

If a person specifically uses themself, however, respect that choice.

For academic writing

Check your required style guide. If there is no specific rule, themselves is the conservative choice.

For personal writing

Either form can work. If you are writing about a specific person who uses themself, using their preferred form is often the clearest and most respectful choice.

Common Mistakes with Themselves or Themself

Mistake 1: Using themself for a plural subject

Incorrect:

The children taught themself to swim.

Correct:

The children taught themselves to swim.

Why? The subject is plural.

Mistake 2: Assuming themself is always wrong

This is too simple.

Themself is an established word. Dictionaries record its use, especially with singular they. However, it is not accepted equally by every style guide.

Mistake 3: Assuming themselves is always plural

Modern English often uses themselves with singular they.

If anyone calls, tell them to help themselves.

Here, anyone is singular, but themselves is used as a gender-neutral reflexive form. Oxford and Merriam-Webster both document this use.

Mistake 4: Writing theirself

Avoid:

Someone should prepare theirself.

Use:

Someone should prepare themselves.

Or, where accepted:

Someone should prepare themself.

Mistake 5: Changing the verb after singular they

Do not write:

They is responsible for themselves.

Write:

They are responsible for themselves.

Singular they still takes the verb form are, just as ordinary they does.

Themselves or Themself in Everyday Examples

In emails

Safe professional version:

Please ask the applicant to introduce themselves at the beginning of the meeting.

If the person uses themself and your workplace accepts it:

Please ask the applicant to introduce themself at the beginning of the meeting.

In news writing

News organizations may use singular they for a person whose gender is unknown or for a person who uses they/them pronouns.

The spokesperson said they would represent themselves at the hearing.

Themself may appear when it refers specifically to one person:

The artist said they wanted to express themself through the work.

Merriam-Webster notes that themself has appeared in major newspapers, although it remains much less common than themselves in edited text.

On social media

Informal writing often accepts themself more easily:

Everyone should be free to be themself.

This form is especially common when people are discussing identity or individual self-expression.

In formal writing

For a broad audience, choose the more established form:

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Every employee should ask themselves whether the decision is fair.

If a person’s own pronoun preference is themself, use that form when appropriate:

Sam said they wanted to describe themself in their own words.

In academic writing

Follow your institution’s style guide. Some major style authorities now allow themself for a singular person using they/them pronouns, while themselves remains more common.

Themselves or Themself Google Trends & Usage Data

Search interest for “themselves or themself” reflects a wider change in English. People are not only asking which spelling is correct. They are also asking how singular they works.

There is no simple official Google Trends number that represents the worldwide usage of these words. 

Google Trends measures relative search interest, not the total number of times a word is used in English. Search results can also change by country, date range, and search category.

The broader language evidence is clearer:

  • Themselves remains much more established and common.
  • Themself is gaining attention as singular they becomes more widely accepted.
  • Themself appears more often in discussions of gender-neutral language and individual identity.
  • Dictionaries in both American and British English now record the form.
  • Formal acceptance still varies by dictionary and style guide.

Usage research also shows that themself remains relatively infrequent compared with themselves, even though it has gained ground in recent decades.

This explains why people searching for “themselves or themself” often see conflicting answers. The language is changing, but not all style authorities are changing at the same speed.

For current search interest, Google Trends is best used with a selected country and date range rather than treated as a permanent worldwide ranking.

Themselves vs Themself: Comparison Table

FeatureThemselvesThemself
Basic formthem + selvesthem + self
Plural peopleYesNo
Singular theyYesYes
Formal acceptanceVery highVaries
Common in edited writingYesLess common
Common in speechYesIncreasing
Used for nonbinary singular theyYesYes
Safest general choiceYesDepends on style
British EnglishStandardLess formally accepted
American EnglishStandardIncreasingly accepted
Canadian guidanceStandardAlso permitted in some guidance
Main riskCan sound plural to some readersSome readers may view it as nonstandard

The key point is simple: themselves has wider acceptance, while themself has a more specific singular function.

FAQs

Is “themself” a real word?

Yes. Themself is a real English word recorded by major dictionaries. It is used especially as a singular reflexive form of they. Some dictionaries still label it nonstandard or less accepted.

Is “themselves” correct for one person?

Yes. Singular they can take themselves, especially in general or formal writing.

Everyone should look after themselves.

This use is widely recognized.

Is “themself” grammatically correct?

It can be. Themself is increasingly used for one person who is referred to with singular they. However, acceptance differs among style guides and readers.

Which is more formal: themselves or themself?

Themselves is generally the safer formal choice because it has broader acceptance.

Should I use “themself” for a nonbinary person?

If that person uses themself, yes. Respecting a person’s stated pronouns and preferred language is more important than forcing a different form.

Is “theirself” correct?

Theirself is generally treated as nonstandard. In most formal writing, use themselves or themself, depending on meaning and style.

Is “themselves or themself” a British or American English issue?

No. Both British and American English use themselves and recognize themself. The main difference is the level of acceptance and frequency, not the spelling system.

Conclusion

The choice between themselves or themself depends mainly on number, meaning, audience, and style. When the subject is clearly plural, themselves is the correct choice: “The players congratulated themselves.”

When they refers to one person, both themselves and themself can appear. Themselves is still the safer choice for most formal, academic, and professional writing because it is more widely accepted.

Themself is a genuine English form that is becoming more common, especially with singular they and when referring to a specific person who uses they/them pronouns.

There is also no simple British-versus-American spelling rule here. Both varieties use both forms. The real issue is style and acceptance.

If you are unsure, use themselves. If a person prefers themself, or your style guide permits it, themself can be a clear and useful choice.

In short: themselves is the safest general answer; themself is an increasingly accepted singular option.

Mudassar

Mudassar

Mudassar is a grammar writer with hands-on experience simplifying English rules, corrections, and word differences for everyday readers.

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